So here I am, in a supposedly 50,000 year old Martial Medical Daoist Clan right? And I'm called in to Temp CEO one of the clan's holding companies. If this all sounds way cloak and dagger, it's not. Just replace the word "clan" for "family." Oh, and "dagger" with "sword."

In the middle of my restructuring and ramping up for international marketing and distribution capacity, We call in a Quickbooks consultant to integrate quickbooks with paypal with fedex. Entering data in trippplicate is just assinine. Hell, it qualifies as assiten!

She makes it into the office at about 1AM (yes, we work 24/7) and sure enough, as soon as she sits down, my boss, my teacher, and Paternal Head of the Clan walks in and my DSL goes out.

Out.

Mind you, the DSL goes out in this office about 2x a day. The modem is likely on the "fritz" (ancient Chinese expression). So I walk into the server room. As soon as I get in there, I hear my boss say, "WAN! (that's me. pronounced 'one')" What did you do?! Our accounting effiency expert is here and you ruined the DSL connection!

I have this fantastic full body massage chair that's perfect for deep meditation. I use it. On full blast.

Context: When my Boss gets disturbed, Pai Mei AND Chuck Norris tremble in each other's arms.

So I explain, "No Sir, I'm in the server room BECAUSE the DSL went out. It does so a few times a day."

"No. You broke it!" He clarifies.

"I'm working on fixing it Sir," I explained as I power cycled the switch, router, and modem.

"Don't do anything! How can I trust the one who broke it to fix it!?" He says in a soft voice that makes the building rattle and made one #FordFiesta in an adjacent parking lot flip over.

So I do what any sys admin would do and call the DSL service provider. They tell me that Seattle has had service issues recently. They say they will run a diagnostic and send out a field tech if needed.

Within minutes, all of you friends from facebook and twitter come back to me. I run over to the newly forbidden server room zone and the DSL WWAN light is back on green!

I asked my boss and Grand Master Swordsman of the Mu Gai Ryu Samurai Clan what he did. He tells me I crossed a voice line with the DSL line. I agree, "Yes Sir!"

I sit back down at my desk and find a Google Voice Transcribed email from the telco, "We've reset your local DSL gateway a few minutes ago. You should be back online shortly."

Context: When my Boss gets disturbed, Pai Mei AND Chuck Norris tremble in each other's arms.

Funny thing is that I didn't touch a thing. My boss didn't either. But when I was in the server room, all hell broke loose. When he walked in, angels started to sing. So I get back to my office and reflect.

I have this fantastic full body massage chair that's perfect for deep meditation. I use it. On full blast.

When I woke up this morning, I remembered a couple of dreams. I saw an innocent man with poor timing get shot. I saw another innocent man picking up the smoking gun as the police arrived. And I remembered an old lesson about the I Ching Trigram . Fire is two external yang or projecting power lines with an internal broken line yin soft core. The true nature of a thing is it's internal power.

"Without a passive wick the fire cannot of itself stand and intimidate. But in the 3 dimensional material word, the external is what will burn you," said my teacher.

He continued, "He who takes full responsibility for the external, no matter what the internal truth, gains mastery over this plane of the five senses."

About the Client Company: JBNI

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Part one

Part two

Have a nice day.

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There was a day two winters ago, I was fuming with anger. You didn't need any special siddhis to be able to smell the fury from miles away. I was betrayed. I was insulted. Everything I held dear was spat upon.

As I paced around thinking about how best to erase one person from existence, a Master appeared and began a conversation with me.

He told me of a man who had incensed him. To be insulted by a wise man was an honor. But to be insulted by an ignorant idiot was is repugnant. It would be a service to society at large to exterminate this pest.

So the Master reached for his sword to sever the idiot's unworthy head. It would have happend faster than the moron could blink. This is when it occurred to my Master that this punishment was not nearly enough. The ignoramus would have to be made to suffer the rest of his life.

The Master swung his sword to sever the fool's legs, arms, and tongue from out of his mouth all in one blinding lightning strike. The legs, so that the ass would never be able to spread his shit. The arms so he would never be able point out any of his foolery. And his tongue so he would never be able to speak his idiocy.

But then, just as quickly, it occurred to the Master that without legs, the egotistical dolt would be unable to go places where he'd make more enemies. So his legs were spared in the interests of letting retribution against him continue to amass. Just before his disembodied arms plopped down to the ground, the Master realized that few honorable men would strike an armless trollop. So with one surgically precise flip of his ghostly sword, the nimrod would have to see his own tongue ejected from his mouth.

This is when the Master realized the most viscious and vengeful retribution he could lay upon the head of this strumpet. His tongue was what got him in the most trouble. So the blade of the sword would have to exact the most venomous of lacerations. It would cut away any possibility that the nincompoop would ever be freed from his tongue.

The Master walked away never drawing his sword, laughing -- avenged.

PS. I begged a master on bloody knees for the secrets in my new ebook. Save yourself a perfectly good pair of jeans. Just buy it. http://master.journik.com

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