How to Get Into the News Media and Pull Big Bloggers Like Guy Kawasaki With 
... #1: Credibility Bankrupt. How to be a celebrity. Or atleast have as many customers... be the "Consumer Mentor"(tm)
There's a little known cafe in Santa Monica, CA where one of five people in line for a mocha, or an americano wears big dark shades and low fitted baseball caps. It's pretty crowded so they sit where they can. They grab a paper and if they happen to kick you under the table, they say, "excuse me."
The other four of five people don't wear camo.
One out of these four speak into cell phones loudly, "Yeah, Yeah, Absolutely! He's definately a mentzch, he's the guy who got Pitt and DiCaprio attached to my script. No, no, I'm gunna decline that offer for two (million) bucks as soon as I get off the phone with you... No, ofcourse not! I'm gunna have my attorney draft it for me... No, he's not going out with that super model anymore. Svetlana knows which boat to catch. She came over to MY pad last night... Yeah, she ____'d me dry!"
Then, the second one of the four stares at the first one of the five. He stares until the one looks and says, "Hi. How are you?"
The second one says to the first of five, "Oh My Gawd! You're Leonardo DiCaprio!"
The first of the four realizes that everyone in the cafe realizes that he's full of shit and walks out wishing he too was in camo.
The second one continues, "I'm not done with acting lessons yet but I do have a script! Will you please, please, please, read it? Stay here, It's in my car. I'll get it. Wait, if you're leaving I'll bring it to your car. Which one is yours? No, never mind. It's not really ready. My acting is better anyways. I'll do my favorite line for you right now. In fact, I'll auto DM it to you."
The third of the four out of the five quietly reads thick packets of paper bound by copper tacks, signs official looking documents and takes phone calls outside. They have to pause their conversation when another AMG or Lambo drives by because for the most part, they are whispering.
As the first one of the five hurrys to leave the cafe, he notices the third of the four and stops to appologize for leaving without saying hello. The third just nods a paternal nod and goes on with his conversation, quietly.
There is one more member to this cast. The fourth of the four. He incidentally also happens to be the fifth of the five. He is dressed just like the third to whom the first showed respect. He walks outside to make a phone call just like the third. He smiles politely at tourists trying to figure out if they recognize him just like the third. But he's not. He's the fourth of the four and the fifth of the five.
The third just nods a paternal nod and goes on with his conversation, quietly.
But sure enough, after a bit of time, firsts and thirds start remembering our fourth-fifth. Sure enough, they pass by and offer hat tips lest they accidently fail to pay homage to an even bigger third sporting even lower DL status.
Before long, the fourth-fifth gets invited to house parties in the "Bu." Before long, the fourth-fifth gets invited to yacht excursions down to Baja. Before long, by doing nothing more than showing respect, being cool, and being close, the fourth-fifth becomes a third or first as he wishes, while the first and second of four get eighty-sixed.
Now all you need to know is where that cafe is. Well, if you are a math teacher, that cafe is right here: Math. If you are an ESL teacher, your cafe is here: ESL. If you teach yoga try this cafe: yoga. Sit next to them. Mind your own business. Follow them. 20% will follow you back. If you dress your Twitter bio well, 50% more will follow you back making it a full 1:3 ratio.
But what ever you do, remember to be four and five.
Recommend that you're friends follow @journik because it will make all of us feel good.
continued: HackEDU
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