If You Live In NYC or LA Take Notes, In Triplicate.
Male birds sing, kamakazi dive bomb other birds, and puff up like balloons. Male giraffes stimulate, then drink female giraffes' urine to determine if they've found a worthy mate. Drone bees accept that their penises will be broken off and permanently embedded inside their queen during copulation (prevents competition). And praying mantis males are totally ok getting their head eaten (literally) after copulation.
But the most unlikely, improbable, bizarre, and unfortunate mating behavior happens between humans.
I suppose if you look at the escalating complexity of human neurology it goes to reason that humans would have more complex mating behavior. After all, both men and women who are in heat ritualistically dull their neurology when they want to simplify the mating process.
In the insect and animal Kingdom, each species has a set alpha in the male - female mating ritual. With birds, bees, and praying mantis, the female sits back picks their mate. In the Giraffe world, the male assaults their female of choice until she lets him have his way with her.
With humans, it can go either way. And it does. It goes both ways across culture, across age, and across gender many times throughout the mating ritual.
Without even touching on the bar scene -- which way a woman crosses her legs, whether a man pulls out his Amex Black Card, who leans in closer over the loud music, whether phone numbers are exchanged or biological fluids are exchanged, there is more than enough complexity in mating through social networks that we can just focus on social sphere mating.
Men and women want totally different things. And the way they go about getting these things should make it impossible for humans to mate.
Have you ever seen a droves of Christian women falling for perfectly eligible Buddhist bachelors? Have you ever seen droves of nurses falling for perfectly eligible architects? What about droves of NYC women falling for perfectly eligible LA bachelors?
NYC has the highest women to men ratio. LA, Seattle and Silicon Valley have the highest male to women ratio. You would think that these geographically socialized groups could just fly 5 hours cross country and have a mass mating season. But it just doesn't work that way. Seattle, LA and Silicon Valley are male dominated due to the computer engineering industries. And NYC is dominated by female models due to the fashion industry. But as ideal as it may seem, mass inter-social-sphere mating simply does not happen.
If you want to exagerate the polarity of male female dispersal tenfold, women in heat need only go to an architects' conference. The annual schedule is here and this is a largely male dominated industry. Men in heat need only attend a health care conference. A disproportionate percentage of highly educated financially sound women can be found here.
As simple as it may seem, men have not been able to break through and geographic, financial, belief, professional or any other sociological bubble en masse. And women have no interest in doing so.
Ironically, the reason is simple.
Men, it's far less work to become the top dog Alpha at work than win over a random gorgeous women
Men seek beauty. Women seek security. This may seem like neanderthal pre women's lib and pre ACLU thinking but it's true. If you men understand this concept fully, you'll save yourself a great deal of Grey Goose Cosmo money.
The most desirable women in any social sphere (if she is of social influence) will always pursue the alpha male in that sphere. Be it her corporation, church, college, industry or town, she will pursue a man who has alpha influence over her social sphere. Think of the consequence of not doing so. Lincoln High's head cheerleader would be far out of her comfort zone at a Jefferson High State Finals. A nurse would have little in common in a room filled with architects. A Christian woman would be uncomfortable in a room full of her husband's Buddhist buddies. This effect is amplified upon children.
For men, these concerns are not even within their field of calculation. The only thing that concerns men is getting the prettiest girl pregnant. Statistically, good looking children get the most attention from teachers, have the most friends, and get the best jobs. All of this is necessary from the man's point of view. The consequence of having ugly children for men is working overtime.
Men seek beauty. Women (thinking about babies) seek security. This may seem like neanderthal pre women's lib and pre ACLU thinking but it's true
Men, it's far less work to become the top dog Alpha in your social sphere than to win over a random gorgeous women who is in a totally different social bubble. So leave the bar. Go back to work (Top dogs don't even sleep).
PS. Even if you do live in a big city like LA or NYC, if you're an IPhone Developer like me, you might wanna think about being an Alpha in a space where the only person you associate with is not your Barista.
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