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60% of all Twitter users quit Twitter within a few weeks. 20% of all tweets are spam. 40% is useless drivel. And for these reasons, 60% of all Twitter users quit Twitter within a few weeks.

But you SHOULD know, these are the chumps with no game.

I spend seven years of my life as an ad agency / pr firm creative director and about the same amount of time as a womanizer. In fact they have just about the same job description. It's all about seduction so I can get all creative on the client's ass.

If you joined Twitter expecting to connect on any meaningful level with a celebrity, ceo, or victoria's secret model, refer to paragraph #2. Twitter is not going to give you that connection even if the rock star does see your tweets. Why? If you had dozens of Twitter stalkers and thousands of @replies a day, you'd understand what these Paragraph Twos Dont.

So, How do you get to the point where you can actually seduce someone to consumate a business deal or a sexual deal (if you're into that sort of thing)?

Ironically, if you don't already know that answer to the above question, all the pick-up artist camps and sales seminars aint gunna work for ya. Because it's really not about what you do but WHO you are.

Seduction is all about giving the right thing only in the right amount. If you ain't got game, you'll never get this alchemical mixture right. But, since I did seduce you into bumping my CTR, here's the breakdown:

1. Listen.
Read, reflect, and listen to the person you want to meet. Then before you ever make first contact, read, reflect, and listen some more.

2. Network.
Do you know why the wing-man thing works better than the lone wolf thing? Do you know why the bunch of friends thing works better than the wing-man thing? Do you know why the worst thing is being that one dude with a bunch of hotties? The answer to all of the above is the same. The people you keep company with tells your "target" (sorry ladies... or college dudes with a cougar over your shoulder) volumes about you.

Think about it. Hunting with one wing-man means you're both hunting. Target=defensive. Hunting with a mixed group means both dudes and da'lay-daes both accept you. Hunting with a bunch of Brazillian models draped over you means you are gay.

So, get to know your target's friends first. Get your friends to meet your "target's" friends. THEN, finally, do NOT make direct contact.

3. Get An Introduction.
Sure, sure, this step is unnecessary. But an intro goes a long way. Besides, if you can even get enough people to like you to where you can get to level 3 (You are HERE). You've Already Got Game. 

If you see a Tiger chillin with a bunch of gazelles, it's a gay tiger (not that there's anything wrong with that).

And the next five steps? How to "consumate the deal" via Twitter. Social Media and Seduction.

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Yes. But yes like a smile is useless for sex.

Ever watch that show right after Reading Rainbow with @levarburton: 3-2-1 Contact!? In the end, everything is about the consumation. Without the consumation, you got nuttin.

You consumate a purchase at the cash register. There's even a retail marketing term for it -- Point of Sale. You consumate a business deal not at the contract but at the ejaculation of the first check payment. If consumating a business deal was instead at the contract signing stage, then consumating a white wedding would be at the altar.

Everything is about consumation. So, will Twitter get you paid, laid, or made? No. It won't. That's not what first contact is all about. Unless you're ok with a high risk of venereal disease.

In the last few days a study has been going around saying that 20% of twitter is spam and 40% is useless drivel. Ergo (who says that anymore! And if you thought it was totally normal to say "ergo," I don't even want you reading my blog -- Go away!), ergo: "Twitter is useless for business." 

All the writers who came to this conclusion have obviously never taken a course in sales or marketing (aka S&M). The biggest point of enlightenment in sales and marketing, like everything else in life, the revelation, is always the same. You are asked a Zen Koan, what is a business card for? The enlightened answer: "To get to the next step."

What is a phone call for? A: "To get to the next step."

Believe me. 99% of the people on Twitter are obsessive cyber-stalkers. I know. I get stalked all the time. So no wonder the A-Listers don't reply to you...

What is a meeting for? A: you get the idea now.

Take a lesson from the world of mating. Start at both ends... *OF THE MATING CYCLE! PERV! * First try the direct approach, "You're hot. Let's go back to my place and architect a strategic synergy."

And try the opposite end. Make eyecontact, smile, show up at the gym at the same time several times before even saying hello. And THIS, Gentle Reader, is TWITTER. NEXT: How To Explain Social Media to you Boss

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You know that guy who wrote "Tipping Point?" He also wrote a few other books. Well, I've been looking for a book deal myself. Yesterday, I found that his publisher UNfollowed me. Yep.

The week before that, I found out that the Mayor of LA unfollowed me. And there went my "IN" with the mayor's ball come Oscars Season.

So, export your followers so you know who's following you. How? http://twitterexport.com looks legit. Note. I didn't test it BUT it doesn't ask for your password so what can it hurt? When you're done there, unfollow slackers at http://untweeps.com (i'm an investor)

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I ask: http://twitter.com/journik/status/3293002445

The debate rages on...

http://twitter.com/rww/status/3293171075

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PDF available on request. http://twitter.com/journik

PS. no offense intended to facebook users. What I was referring to were the 3 facebook users who are clueless. o_O

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"@RyanSeacrest What's it going to take to get you to answer me?!?!"

Is Twitter Fever Breaking?

It all depends on what you consider healthy body temperature. When Oprah joined on, just like when many other celebrities jumped in, Twitter Fever shot so high servers crashed.

The idea was that Twitter gave mortal man a voice. The idea was that Twitter gave the lowly fan access to the stars and maybe even gave him a chance at stardom too. I suppose to some degree, all of this is true. But the reason 60% of twitter users stop using Twitter soon after signup is disillusionment.

The stars don't write back. The CEOs don't name a product after you. Even Starbucks tells you to go fill out a form.

So what the hell is Twitter good for? For most, Twitter is just another way for the influencers to micro reach and micro influence you.For most, Twitter is nothing more than the last mile where advertisers, celebrities, and media can reach you right down to the sms cell phone in bed at 3am level.

"RT @starbucks : @jasoncalacanis Why don't you suggest sugarfree mocha at mystarbucksidea.com"

However, for the people who know how to duck dive (surfing term to describe finding the undercurrent underneath a peaking wave) under the wave of Oprah, Ashton Kutcher, and the like, Twitter is everything it seemed.

Executives, journalists, and even celebrities like @RyanSeacrest read their @replies more often than their email. I see them say so all the time. It takes them days to get to a 0 inbox count and only minutes to skim 100's of @replies. If you think this number is low, try a search.twitter.com for @ryanseacrest or even @aplusk. You'd be surprised to find that they, just like you, have a hard time getting any replies at all.

So why do so many quit Twitter? The answer is in the people who don't. The people who have used Twitter long before Oprah showed up will continue to use Twitter long after you're gone. They don't believe in get rich quick schemes. They don't do golden opportunities. They don't even measure their costs. They keep on plugging away til they get to a goal, take a week vacation, then get back on the horse.

Unless you are like them, you should have left a long time ago. If you are, you too will stay and keep chipping away at making meaningful impressions, connections, and friendships. You will succeed if you're body temp is cool. Next: http://journik.posterous.com/is-twitter-useless-drivel-ala-useless-for-bus iness?

So long does it take? Continued: Twitter A-list

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I am honored and very fortunate to have the comment of another a-list web entrepreneur contribute to this blog. Ironically, he had an even tougher journey than most in that he had to make a cultural and international cross over -- he is from the place that invented the word, "entrepreneur" in a California dominated industry.

So, I asked him, "Loic, what is your secret to getting so many people together? For example, your Annual LeWeb Conference in Paris (with attendance that rivals stadium events), Seesmic video community, Seesmic Twitter Air App, etc..." His response:

http://twitter.com/loic/status/3246623727

to contact me: http://twitter.com/journik | to see how other a-listers made it to the top: http://journik.posterous.com/tag/alist

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Nowwadays, numbers in the millions don't really make us all dizzy in the cranium.

A million used to be a big number. But now, with CTRs and social media, 1,000,000 is for many, the basic rule of measure.

For example, CNN on Twitter has 2,543,638 followers. You realize that they got a major boost after competing with @aplusk for the million mark. Ashton Kutcher, @aplusk, has 3,122,483 followers right now. Again, not dizzying to the cranium. Until you compare these figures with "old *crusty* media."

Do you have any idea how many people watched the network news tv mega coverage of Obama's innaguration?

According to The Live Feed: 

Obama's speech was seen by more U.S. viewers than the Beijing Olympics opening ceremony (34.2 million).

Here's the part where you get to put your pinky finger in your mouth, CNN, only had 8.1 million viewers and has no more than 1.1 million views on a regular basis (source: Nielsen)

Think about this a second, @aplusk has more followers by 300% than regularly watch Ted Turner or Rupert Murdock (the guys that own CNN and FOX).

Is it time you took Twitter seriously? Is it time you worked with a net born native?

EDIT: THIS post just got atleast another 500 follower reach thanks to http://twitter.com/whitecoatstrat/statuses/3231710478

And another 300+ from Marketing Strategist: http://twitter.com/ybeitollahi/status/3232006209

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http://twitter.com/BJMendelson/statuses/3149494781

All I did was post a useful comment where the other bigshots were sure to see it http://www.careerrenegade.com/why-small-is-the-new-big-in-social-media-marketing/

If you've never heard of BJ, he has 1 million followers because of his feel good cause and because he is on the Twitter recommended tweeple list.

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